41st: The Beans of Haruhi Suzumiya

[godbent]

[Voice]

You know, we're coming up on February. [...] I guess the obvious thing is Valentines, given the weird fetish that the Organization has for it, but there's also Setsubun. People from Japan know about that, right? The SOS-Brigade's never really done something for it, but we should this year.

[That said, her voice doesn't have a ton of gusto in it. It's sort of dulled, just... stating things matter-of-factly, almost bored. She's still upset about Minato and various other problems associated with that. She still wants to be alone, but being alone isn't going to help anyone else. She's not quite altruistic enough to care about everyone, but there's a few people...]

I guess the lunar new year would be around now too, wouldn't it? But it's hard to call that unless anyone's been charting the moon too carefully here. And Foundation Day and we missed Coming of Age Day, but who cares about both of those?

[...Though, there's also that thing with Richard and Isamu. Nope, don't care.]

Whatever. Haruhi Suzumya, over and out.

[And if you want action, she is at the Brigade's HQ. Sort of wanting and sort of not wanting people to step in]

Comments

[herotypical]

[ she shuts her own eyes, settling loose fists of fingers against her own knees. dropping her shoulders. ] Relax. [ breathe in; breathe out. ]

[ buffy's voice softens. although it isn't objectively kind, it's still stripped of all that attitude she wears daily in almost every social encounter she enters. but tonight, it's turned coaxing; convincing; welcoming. ]

Deep breaths, Haruhi. There is nothing but you.

[ she hopes the girl concentrates. she hopes the girl is even ready for this sort of invitation. hell, she hopes she herself can remember giles's words with confidence. ]

[godbent]

[Okay, definitely not seiza for this. she shifts her sitting position to be cross-legged. She rests her hands around her feet, considering. She can still hear Buffy, she can still smell the hot springs, feel the heat... but no, this is something she is pretty sure she can do. she's done meditation before, after all (not super successfully, but). She tries to match her breathing to what Buffy's doing and makes a noise of agreement]

[herotypical]

Keep on relaxing. Then -- when you think you're ready -- I want you to open your eyes once again. Y'know, in your own time. And when you do? I want you to look straight into the crystals between us.

[godbent]

Alright, I get it. [that probably sounded too terse. Hell, it felt too terse. She exhales deeply again, before inhaling. She's meditated before, she knows she can do this! ...But focusing on that would be counter-productive, wouldn't it? so instead, she just tries to empty her mind. It's hard to empty one's mind, but...]

[herotypical]

[ and it would be even harder, buffy knows, to empty a mind when someone else is chattering. and so she lapses into silence, hoping her own anxiety doesn't bleed through. sharing the exercise with anyone who isn't giles is a frightfully new experience; however, it seems just a little fitting. giles had taken to haruhi, in his own way.

and in spite of all else, she does want to help... ]

[godbent]

[The mood here's a little awkward, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure that out. Even so, awkward moods aren't anything new and she knows it. She tries initially to not focus on it, but then, with her eyes still closed, she opens and closes the fingers on her hand, wondering why this is awkward? Which is easy, because she's with Buffy. But there's really no more reason for Buffy to feel awkward to her...

Once she's concluded that, it's not like it magically becomes easier, but she finishes one train of thought and as such she doesn't immediately have a new one due to her trying to focus on, well, nothing. So, she's feeling a little more confident. She opens her eyes and focuses on the crystals]

[herotypical]

[ something has changed. nothing dire; nothing serious. but it's enough to alert the slayer into opening her own eyes. one might go so far as to say the crystals themselves seems to be humming.

she resists the urge to smile. ]

Look into them. They're not perfect; they have flaws deep in the stone. Search those out, and let everything else sorta...drift.

[godbent]

No stone's perfect- [Says the more rational part of her mind. But okay, she'll look for them. The first one she finds hits her immediately, perhaps because of some intuition or maybe it's just super obvious. The difficulty becomes looking for another one when he eyes keep drifting back to that first one she found. Still, her focus on the whole process is pretty notable]

[herotypical]

[ no stone's perfect. she doesn't respond except with a ghost of a smile. and a little bit of sadness. the old flaw-in-the-stone method left a few bitter feelings in her heart, but years later she could understand how it could nevertheless be used for good. for relaxation. for peace.

buffy allows two or three minutes to pass before whispering: ] Keep on drifting, Haruhi. You're doing great. Focus inward and let the world fall away. Fall away. Fall away...

[ and with a steady hand, buffy makes the bold attempt to gently reconfigure the crystals' structure. if done correctly -- with haruhi focused and herself cautious -- it should be as if inviting the younger woman into a deeper state of meditation.

if even a single error flickers through the procedure, though...? well -- it would feel a little bit like having your soul dunked into an ice water bath. ]

[godbent]

[She mutters something like "isn't that contradictory?" to herself, but tries to keep up with the focus. Inner focus? She isn't sure she knows how to focus inward, so she just keeps up with the flaw search, allowing that to be a focal point as she zones out everything except the crystals and Buffy. She assumes that the point of the focus would be to get her to go inward anyway, so it's not like she's doing it wrong. At least, she assumes]

[herotypical]

[ silence grows and time passes. seconds, slipping by. and buffy tries to tamp down on her feelings of success and accomplishment, because those self-indulgent sentiments shouldn't be allowed to taint an attempt at finding solitude.

growing every confident by the moment, she nudges the last crystal into place.

and she exhales. by all accounts, perhaps the experiment is a success; perhaps there's a future to be found in future meditation meetings, each one complicating the structure and exercises. for a moment, she imagines a future where she can go so far as to lead haruhi through the tai-chi-like acrobatic movements that pair so well with the crystals. ]

[godbent]

[Oh crystals oh.

Haruhi's thought process - mostly because of how it is supposed to be now, honestly - is much more simple. She's just focused. Empty. Meditative. The crystal's shift felt interesting. That was weird]

[herotypical]

[ an approximate twenty-some minutes winds down before buffy ever-so-gently reaches across the crystals in order to touch haruhi's shoulder. a light nudge -- that's all.

just to draw her her out and touch base now that the preliminary attempt has been made. ]

[godbent]

[Haruhi doesn't blink back to recognition or anything, but she does flutter a little before before she focuses on Buffy's face, tilting her head somewhat. Curiously. Is there something up?]

[herotypical]

...You're doing great. [ she's not sure haruhi herself realizes just how much time has passed. ] Frankly, I wasn't sure whether you and these would even be compatible.

[ she hasn't lifted her fingers from the girl's shoulder. ] I know I didn't bring you down into much more than a trance, but even that's encouraging.

[ she's never spoken so...gently with haruhi, before now. speaking to her almost as though she were one of her girls. ]

[godbent]

Well... it worked out better than I expected. [Quietly, a little... awkwardly because the awkward's floating back, slowly. But it's been working okay so far]

[herotypical]

[ and -- at long last -- she reclaims her hand. both it and her other hand settle lightly in her lap. ]

It's a start. You definitely sank into it smoother than I did, my first time. [ but that's no surprise. buffy had hardly lent herself well to meditation on the first few rounds. ] Eventually -- if you're into it -- I'd wanna get you up to the point of moving under trance. Nothing hinky, I promise. But...kinda like tai chi, you know?

[godbent]

The fact you need to clarify it's nothing hinky just makes it sound more hinky.

[She was cool with it before she said that, but then it sounded weird. But it's more of a statement than an accusation. Ultimately, she'd be cool with more of this. Probably. Maybe.]

[herotypical]

...The brain-control kind of hinky, I mean. Not--

[ she puffs out her cheeks. better to just concede the point. ] Obviously, it's not an activity to get involved with lightly. You kinda want someone you trust on the other side of the moment. And I know you have absolutely no reason to trust me, but--

I'll do right by you. That's about as much as I can promise.

[godbent]

J-jeez, you make it sound like I think you're a bad person. You're just really annoying sometimes. And -- and you know. [She pouts a little, but nods. Understanding what Buffy's getting at there and appreciating the promise she's making]

[herotypical]

And...I know. [ she allows. allows whatever other accusation could have been levelled. ]

I guess that's fair. And I find myself oddly comforted by the fact -- in your mind -- that I'm merely annoying, and not verging on at-risk-for-brainwashing.

[godbent]

Even if you were a brainwasher, it's not like you could brainwash me. Besides, even if you meddle too much and suck the enjoyment out of other things, it's not like you're someone who goes around hurting people. You're actually institutionally against those. Come on, what do you take my opinions for?

[herotypical]

Puh-lease. If I was a brainwasher, I could totally brainwash you. It'd be my job. I'd be damn good at it.

[ yes. this is the part she tries to argue. ]

[godbent]

My mind's a fortress, you couldn't manage it.

[herotypical]

...I could plant schemes and notions into your dreams. You'd never see it coming.

[ so childish. ]