godbent | Appointments Post ( II )

Entry tags:

*appointments

Appointments Post ( II )

This post here is for personal conversations which should happen but one or both of us doesn't want to put up a new post/log and thus we will just thread it out here. This can be used to thread with Haruhi anytime and anywhere. This can either be in person (with action), or via the journal's call feature (voice and/or written).

When replying to this post please mark in the subject line when and how it is taking place EX:
[Action, March 11th]
[Voice, September 8th]
Written, June 10th]

(Link to old one here)

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[There is the sound of a book's spin hitting the couch and then dropping itself onto the floor. Haruhi's breath catches, and she looks over at the book with wide eyes, and -]

What.

[He takes a deep breath again before repeating himself, this time trying to not stumble with his words, though he's pretty sure that's not what caused her to need a double take.]

I asked Ange to marry me. We're engaged now, so from now on, I'll take her last name and be Keiichi Ushiromiya.

-...You don't take names until you are married, you idiot.

[But she still sounds shocked, getting hold of her journal]

I know, but I don't know when we will get married... And actually that would only be a ceremony to make it even more official, so I'll take her last name already.

[It's not just a whim, he has thought about it for some time, though he knows it probably sounds like just that.]

That's a dumbest thing I ever heard. Do you know how many things can go wrong between the point of engagement and the ceremony?! That's prime break up time coming from both sides of the coin!

[she inhales briefly before]

And engaged?! Are you kidding me?! What's wrong with you?

[Sounds about the right reaction to expect from Haruhi.]

Do you want the full list or the short version will suffice? If it's okay with the short version then it goes like this: I'm a man who wants to make Ange happier than she has ever been. And I don't want her or me to wake up one day and find that the other is gone from here without having done everything we could to reach that happiness.

[His reply is calm, his tone almost humorous.]

I know very well how many things could go wrong between now and the ceremony, not only between us as a couple but with the place we're in as a whole. But, you see, to me, this engagement doesn't really mean that we're "going to get married", I consider myself already married, only lacking a ceremony to make it official to everyone else. And I know that she feels the same way and she's okay with me taking the name already.

[...That's stupid. More than that, it's also deeply uncomfortable. Now with the book properly in her hands, she glances off to the side, thinking a moment. Keiichi, engaged. Keiichi, married. Why would he be doing this? Why would he... Bah. It shouldn't surprise her, but it did. She bites her lip before exhaling]

That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard.

I figured you would say that.

[He did, he also knows that it probably seems stupid to her. But that's okay with him.]

You said it, after all. My logic regarding relationships is broken.

This is worse than broken, this is ridiculous.

I guess that works too.

[He sighs, still taking it with humor because it's just like her and he expected it. But it's a bit sad that she has to make her point so clear.]

I didn't know broken was better than ridiculous though.

Broken just means it contradicts common sense. This contradicts... I don't even know, something more common than that! Keiichi, I'm pretty sure you're younger than Minato and me and you're engaged?! Engaged and consider yourself married?! What's--- ["wrong with you" she holds that back. Inhales and exhales rapidly, trying to get a grip on herself]

I may be younger but I'm from older times than yours. So is Ange. And anyway in this place age matters little, it's not like on Earth where you are going to have an average of eighty years to live and do things, here I could leave tomorrow and never return, or worse return without memories or changed.

[Like Haruhi did, see how that ended working for her relationship with Winry, though they managed to sail on it for some time. Then again maybe it wouldn't have worked either with Haruki.]

Look, I know you don't approve of this, I expected it and would have gotten worried if you had just smiled and congratulated me. But can't you at least congratulate me while scolding me for my decisions?

[No.

That's really what she wants to say, and as she sits there awkwardly for a moment, she wonders if the silence on her end is telling of that fact. From a broken logical sense, Keiichi's argument makes sense, but the transitive nature of Luceti is exactly why marriage is stupid. It's stupid for him, it's stupid for Ange, and it's stupid for... Winry.

She doesn't think this is the case, but maybe the knot forming in the pit of her stomach isn't about the boy at all, but rather about her girl and how things ended for them. Maybe it's because she on;y just started dating Minato. Maybe it's a lot of things.]

[But, as uncomfortable as this makes her, she is more than that. So after that distinct and awkward pause, and manages to push out-]

Congratulations. I hope you two are happy.

[The silence actually says a lot, unfortunately Keiichi's not capable of reading minds and he's an idiot so he's sure that he can't even guess what the reasons for the silence are. Maybe he hit a nerve, mentioning how one could return changed even with their memories intact... No, probably he has hit several nerves without realizing it and he hates that, it makes it impossible to make it up for her.]

Thanks... I-... Nevermind.

[He sighs, he's going to start rambling again and that's no good so he stops himself.]

A penny for your thoughts? Even if it's more about how stupid I am?

[Sigh] I don't want to be married.

Just to be clear, you mean here or in general? Because if I had to guess I would say in general, at least not until you are lot older.

Yeah, in general. I don't know... it's stupid, getting married, starting a family, all that stuff. It's like "I'm going to give up on ever making something of myself" - particularly for a girl. You're resigning yourself to making dinners and planting kisses on established holidays and all sorts of mundane, useless things. [She's speaking a bit more rapidly as she goes on] Once you're married, you have to be stuck in the status quo, you're expected to never do anything except be a wife and maybe a mother. you can't go on any big adventures or find mysterious things or anything like that. I mean who ever heard of a housewife or an officer worker finding Atlantis or even doing anything interesting with their lives?

But... but-- ... But everyone's in some big hurry to get there and it makes no sense.

You're right, it doesn't make sense. But then again, we're always in a big hurry to grow up, I remember when I was younger all the other kids just couldn't wait to be old enough to stay up until late. Or to drive. Or to not go to school everyday.

Though if you think about it... It's really stupid, wanting to grow up and be in a hurry about it. There's little in it that's really that good.

[It may sound hypocrite given that he has just got engaged but... He has reasons to be in a hurry about it, reasons that don't apply to life in general only to Luceti.]

If we weren't here I don't think I would have even considered dating a girl seriously as of yet.

Haaaah? Don't turn around and change your opinions on me, Keiichi! You're made of serious romance!

I'm not turning around. Just talking in general terms. Really, when I came here the idea of dating a girl was scary to me actually.

... I hurt Mion several times because of that. And Shion. And Rena. I remember it, not the details but I know it was because I didn't dare to look at them as more than friends. Because I didn't want to take that step.

[He sighs.]

And if Ange wasn't Ange, I probably wouldn't have rushed even here either. But with her, even if this place wasn't as it is, I can't allow myself to not go all out.

Anyway! Just because I'm doing something and not backing down it doesn't mean I can't see the bad points it has or why it would be a bad idea.

[God she feels exposed. She feels... not lonely, but lost. "ff Ange wasn't Ange." and he's admitting his rushing. She feels a lump rising in her throat which is totally (or at least mostly) independent of Minato. It harks back to Winry and it harks back to that original year and a half with Kyon.]

Dating people isn't scary. It's stupid and simple.

[A beat]

...I'm sick of love.

Well, to me it felt scary. Because a girlfriend isn't the same as a friend. And if it doesn't work out going back to be friends is hard and painful. I had just made my first friends in my whole life and I didn't want to lose that just for a what if about love.

[He still wouldn't do it if it wasn't for Ange. In fact, it's really no different from how it was with Haruhi. Haruhi had once claimed he was in love with her, he had denied it and right now he has no idea if he was or not. But he knows that when the comment was made, be it a joke or not, it scared him because Haruhi was a friend and he didn't want to go there. He didn't dare to walk that path.

But Ange was different. She had been different from the start and even then he had spent months denying it. Refusing to even start moving, praying that someone else would do it, praying that she would one day say that she had a boyfriend even if it would tear his heart out because he was scared of doing it himself. And then a stupid experiment made him do it and after that he realized that he couldn't stop, that if he didn't do it no one would. He really can't afford not to go all out or not to rush when it's about Ange.

He knows he's making a big bet. He knows he's risking a lot and that if it crashes and falls down it's going to be a hell for both or for just one of them. But he has to, because if he doesn't dive to the deepest and darkest part, there's no way he's going to reach Ange and help her back up, out of the sea and darkness that was swallowing her. That will keep swallowing her back home.

He sighs again as he heard the last part.]

I'm not surprised you are.

[Not just for her character but her romantic life, as far as he knows, hasn't made up a great case for her to not be sick of love and troubled either. it's really not a surprise.]

[Hard and painful, huh?

...Screw that. Screw this. Screw Kyon. Screw hoe distant she can be from Winry sometimes. She tuts at the book and then just isn't sure how to respond again for a moment, glaring up at the ceiling. And then, finally, she just sighs.

Keiichi's engaged, huh?]

[He says nothing, letting her have a moment of silence. He can hear the sigh, so he knows the communication hasn't been cut yet. He waits, patiently, for her to say something else or close the book.]

[Voice, December 27th]

godbent - 2013-01-27 03:28 (UTC) - Expand

[Voice, December 27th]

breaks_destiny - 2013-01-27 04:26 (UTC) - Expand

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