godbent | 8th: The Resolution of Haruhi Suzumiya

8th: The Resolution of Haruhi Suzumiya

[Voice]

[...Okay, she can do this. She's normal, finally (or so she'd like to convince herself) and because of that it's time to get to business.]

...Okay, Brigade, if you didn't get the memo yet we've lost a lot of members- including Naoki and Yoohoo, among others. [Her voice dips. But then there's a slapping sound and she presses on, her tone getting brighter] But that's beside the point! New feathers, there's a lot of you guys now, and old feathers too, some of you guys must want some excitement in your life, right?! Ever feel that budding sense of your existence here being meaningless?! Well, think no further, because for a short time only the SOS-Brigade is accepting applications for new members to our illustrious ranks!

But some of you might think "Wow I'm lame and have been living under a rock and/or haven't read the guide, what is this completely amazing sounding organization," right? Since you asked, I'll answer free of charge!

[and the following part is transcribed with writing as well as spoken. The symbol itself is shown to the journal in the form of her putting a photo-copied version of it up to the camera]

The Spreading Excitement All Over the World with Haruhi Suzumiya Brigade - SOS-Brigade for short - is the greatest organization ever invented. We're dedicated to finding and solving all the mysteries of this world, thus ensuring that everyone in it can lead a fun and worthwhile life! It's like a form of enlightenment! So basically, people who have experienced something mysterious in the past, have experienced something mysterious recently, or who plan on a mysterious experience in the near future should come to the SOS Brigade for them be solved.

But besides that, we have ensure that people have fun! We have big plans for the coming months! It's Spring, and while we obviously won't get Golden Week, there's always time and need for another Hanami or for contests, attractions, fireworks once we get summer, the beach, the lake, you name it, we're on it! You should fully expect your life to be influenced by our might in the near future! I hope your bodies are ready for it!

So there you have it! And, like I said, we're accepting applications! So hurry up and speak up so that I, Haruhi Suzumiya, can process you and determine if you have the right stuff!

[Action]

[Buuut, once that announcement is made in ther break time for school at about 10:30 AM (and thus replies might be later in the day) Haruhi has places to be. She's being low-key about it, but it is White Day, after all. So, during her lunch break at school she sets off- she had her Winry Day yesterday, but she owes Winry something in return. Thus, with a bag over her shoulder around 12:30PM she's made her way to Winry's house to knock.

From there, back to school, finishing it up, the Brigade meeting... and then loitering around town is her MO for the afternoon. She got chocolate for all of the guys in the Brigade (plus Neku and maybe some others) after all, and even she's not voicing it she expects things back from there. ...And Minato. And Keiichi. But she's not going to press the issue there because even she's not sure she wants them. But if you see her lurking around the square in the afternoon that's why.]

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[Haruhi...! Actually was more or less already there, so she just sits at the fountain, waiting for Hanyuu to show. Trying not to think about what this is oh so obviously probably about]

[ and she's there after a little while.

This could be a mistake... she isn't sure anymore. It was easier when she could reset... she could wipe out all of the bad, but... she and Rika had talked about this. Even at home, she couldn't do that again. No more travelling through words.

They had to live in the world they were given.

She gives the brunette a shy wave as she approaches. ]

[Haruhi doesn't wave, instead she just (nervously) taps her foot a little and nods. Waiting for Hanyuu to approach and trying not to think about what's probably to come]

[ this is a conversation she doesn't want to have... but she manages a small smile. ]

Are you ready? [ there is no shyness now. she has to be tough. ]

[No.

...] Yeah, sure. [And then rather than let Hnayuu lead her, Haruhi instead just heads towards the edge of the square and thefore the forest line herself. She needs to control something here]

[ ... and she follows after.

she hadn't really gotten a chance to talk to haruhi about the things she had missed when she had been gone. it had been one thing after another too quickly to reconnect. it felt strange to walk alongside someone she had trusted so much, yet now knew nothing about.

Maybe it was a mistake to talk to her like this. She wasn't sure anymore... but she had to. if she couldn't reset, she had to put her foot down and make sure that the mistakes of the past weren't repeated again.

she's formulating what she has to say on the walk. ]

[To Haruhi's credit, most of what she's thinking about now is when Hanyuu ever started to be someone she knew and respected in this capacity. Rika has always been who she had gone to before, but now with Rika back without clear memories- well, it had changed. Just like Keiichi and Rena has changed. She was now afraid to talk with the girl. But.

Oh well. No doubt Hanyuu had something important to tell her, Haruhi just oh so vainly hopped it wouldn't be riddled with stutters. It might make her listen a bit better.

After quite a while of silent walking in which this girl has willed herself not to think, here's the forest's edge. She's still wary of her, so she only goes in a little bit, but then after she does she nods, folds her arms, and turns to Hanyuu]

I want to know what happened between you and Keiichi.

[ there are no stutters. no pauses or halts. the small girl's voice lacked it's usual flustered rush, instead holding the authoritive tone one might have expected from a god... or perhaps a very stern, overprotective mother. it held no anger or accusation - the last thing that this needed was some sort of confrontation she wasn't sure she would be able to remain in. ]

[...Okay yeah, that was expected. Haruhi knew it was coming, but it's impossible to prevent it from feeling like she was punched in the gut. She thought she was over this, she was over this, but being accused- no she's not being accused, Hanyuu just-]

I- ... we argued.

[ she doesn't need to ask how it ended. she had been there, holding keiichi's hands so he didn't tear his own thought out. hearing those words - go die, go die, she told me to die. Hearing him tear himself down.

Hearing all of that self hatred... ]

... Rika doesn't know Luceti as she once did. With Takano here, from one of those worlds, I can't risk her safety by drawing her out in the open or involving her in these things. [ because rika is a child, even if she no longer truly is. and she deserves a chance at living a normal life here, as she once did. ] ... You'll have to come to me when these conflicts happen.

[ ... ] ... If this was intentional, I would have punished you when it happened.

.. but I know. [how easy it is to make them break. how painful it can be to know that one misdeed, one missed thing, can turn everything on it's head. and she can't blame haruhi. she isn't the first one to set keiichi off - she isn't the first one to cause that paranoia to fester and bubble.

but she survived it. and that's important. hanyuu may not know this girl well, but they share memories. distant, faint memories that don't fully match up - but memories of this place and this time together. ]

[ ... she had come here intending to be so much angrier... but could she really blame haruhi for something that she blamed on herself? ]

... I'm sorry. I'm just glad you're safe.

[..."I'm sorry?" I'm sorry? Her face falls and she balls into fists here, gritting her teeth a little. "Sorry?" SORRY?]

-Cut the crap. You're sorry? You're glad I wasn't-?! Keiichi could never hurt and I know- we both know that! It- [What the hell. Why are you like- What's the point of calling-]

[ there's a long pause. ]

I should have been watching his condition more closely. It got this bad because I wasn't protecting him. [ she barely had. she can't blame haruhi for putting him over the edge, but...

she thinks about the baseball bat. about satako's uncle. she thinks about all of those failed worlds that ended in a murder and then a suicide. but that wasn't this keiichi. he never had... but he could.

could. there is always that terrible word. it could be for the better, or it could end in disaster. that word was a coin toss. ] There are many things that you don't know, Haruhi.

Like what?

[She says coldly. What doesn't she know about that moron? Of course he's killed people, of course he's probably, at some point, murdered Rika or Rena or any of the others - Rika and him and everyone else keep telling her that shit, but why do they have to be so fixated on it]

[ You can change fate. No matter how terrible it seems, no matter how horrible the outcome could possibly be - if you fight hard enough you can change it. A year ago she wouldn't have believed that. She would have told Rika not to get too attached to this world, soothed her anger and hoped the next would be better but...

She could tell the girl about all of those failed worlds. Describe in brutal detail what it was like to see Rena's head cave in under the brutal strikes of Satoshi's baseball bat. Tell him how he had killed a man in cold blood, and how he always, always could. If Rika ever left... She doesn't want to think about that. She wouldn't be able to do it. ]

I hope you never have to know.

...I won't. [Still cold, still distant. She doesn't want to believe in failure- she's seen enough of that sadness to last her a lifetime and she's probably (objective, she knows) seen less than Hanyuu or Rika. Usagi exploding, Taichi dying, Keiichi in that hospital bed, Rena both of those times and several others besides. There's been a lot of horrible things which have happened but it's her SOS-Brigade and she's not- it's.]

I won't because if he... this situation's different.

[Should she tell Hanyuu? No, that feels weird. She just stands there, lamely. Shamed]

[ There's a key piece of information she doesn't have. A century of this has told her that much... but she says nothing. Not yet. She knows that any time in the past things were pushed, they always went wrong.

It wasn't cold evidence or interrogations that saved Hinamizawa, it was love. ]

... I trust you, Haruhi.

[...] Stupid.

[...] That's so stupid. ["I'm so stupid"]

Whatever. Fine.

[She grits her teeth a little, trying to not cry. She'd cried enough in the days past. She'd cried enough before and during the draft and frankly she's sick of being so weak]

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8th: The Resolution of Haruhi Suzumiya

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