godbent | 5th: The Contamination of Haruhi Suzumiya

5th: The Contamination of Haruhi Suzumiya

[Voice]

So everyone, Valentines is supposed to be about love and stuff, right? But have you ever thought what's up with that Saint Valentine guy who originated the holiday?! Given that it's still popular today, is he just some famous dead guy, or is he now a ghost, trying to appeal to everyone's mind and manipulate them?! Wouldn't that explain how it's popular in both Japan and the West?

Bearing that in mind, even if this holiday is kinda stupid, it's still important to adhere to certain traditions in hopes of seeing any possible Valentines spirits. Because of that, I've gotten chocolate for some of you.

[...Namely all of the guys in the Brigade and grudgingly Minato. She considered some others, like Neku or Sokka, but decided against it. She also considered Winry but she's not sure if that's too weird or not. That said, delivering them? No, she's carrying them around in her bag in case she runs into people for other reasons and failing that going to put what's left in a basket at the HQ after she's done.]

More importantly-! A bunch of you have heard about the beach, right?! And you're all psyched to go there this summer?! Well, brought to you by our SOS-Brigade's genius scientist, Leon [this next part is muttered quickly and might not be heard:] andsomehelpfromSokka we're bringing you the all-new Beach Teleportation System! You know how the ones for the Hot Springs work, right?! Same thing here! The village-end for the teleporter is located in the barracks, and the other end is way off, so we can have easy access once it warms up!

All in a day's work for the SOS-Brigade!

[First reply is of course for her two boys. Once they're done feel free though.]

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[Yeah, those fingers may have lingered there a bit more than necessary but you won't hear him complaining. And it's your fault for shoving it like that in his mouth, haha. At least being on the beach you have enough water to wash that hand... Only Minato doesn't do that but uses it to eat the other chocolate.

You know, Keiichi's pretty sure that never before has been so mesmerizing to see someone eat a chocolate so casually. Not that he can think much more because then there comes the unsatisfied Haruhi -as if she's the only one like that-, telling them to just kiss.]

Wh-Wah?!

[Yeah, no coherent noise here, just a -very manly- squeak and his face going to a bright red color.]

[Minato doesn't turn red at all - his reaction is a small frown. He hadn't seen the act as particularly arousing - nice, yes, but Keiichi is a guy and his friend. But Haruhi's reaction is interesting. His expression quickly turns thoughtful, and then calculating.]

Only if you kiss us, too.

[He's emboldened by this good feeling and if she asks them for a favor, she should give them favors in return, right?]

Wha-what the hell-!

[She splutters a moment, her face dissolving into a blush and then a little pout. But-! But-! She looks between the two and then... But! She wants to see them make out...!

But then a plan grows in her head]

Edited 2011-02-20 19:09 (UTC)

Well... only if the results are interesting enough! Then maybe!

[...FFFF]

You can feed me if you do it though.

[Yeah, it may have been nice and it was mesmerizing but still they are both guys and Keiichi's pretty sure he's still heterosexual, thank you very much. His bewilderment calms a bit on hearing Minato's request, well, that's a good condition, surely she'll refuse and then they can move on-

But she doesn't refuse. She accepts, "only if the results are interesting". But they can feed her. That's not fair! It's not fair, right, Minato?

Don't mind Keiichi he's just there, still bewildered. Guess all his pervertedness is just talk after all.]

[Well that's less than the response he wanted, but still pretty good, as long as she really pays up in the end. Also, she doesn't have a camera to blackmail them with.

He gives Keiichi a look. Well, K-1, are you man enough to kiss another man for the promise of rewards?]

[...Actually.

About that.

...rummaging in her bag now. Sneakily]

[Why are you looking at him like that, Minato. Don't give him that look, this isn't a matter of being a man or not. It's his first kiss!!! There's nothing in the world that would be enough of a reward for that. No matter how much he cares for you and all. His first kiss has to be with a girl, maybe not the cute and a bit shy and clumsy type of girl with which he used to dream long ago, but still a girl.

Why aren't his legs working to carry him as far as possible from there?]

[Don't be a chicken. It doesn't count if it's not with someone you're seriously interested in. Or, you can tell yourself that anyway.

Minato is still staring at Keiichi, but when he speaks it's to Haruhi.] You'll have to hand over that bag and your journal first, though.

[-!] No way, I why should I!

[She asks as hands were on her journal]

[Why are you still staring at him while talking to Haruhi?! And why aren't his legs still working. Really, there's no way he can say "this doesn't count" okay? Besides, it's his first kiss, if he sucks Haruhi won't give them anything and then what? It will have been for nothing. No sir, he's not going to move from where he is.

Maybe if he grabs his journal and calls for Bernkastel he could convince her to make a miracle and make it rain a lot? Then again, it's Bernkastel... Probably she would just come and watch while sipping her tea.]

If you photograph this I think Keiichi might die.

[just look at his face, girl. Actually he is making Minato reconsider this plan too.]

...Whatever.

[Releasing her grip on the the journal. She then looks at Keiichi, and then down at her hands... and then at Minato. She blinks once or twice and then sighs]

[Keiichi she's... grabbing your hand now. And trying to - gently at first, but violently if she must - move it down to touch Minato's crotch]

[WHY DO YOU CARE ABOUT BEING PHOTOGRAPHED AND NOT ABOUT DOING IT!? YOU SHOULDN'T EVEN CONSIDER IT IN THE FIRST PLACE!!

Keiichi's just screaming ~~girly~~ manly inside of his head. What's wrong with you two twenty-one century kids? How can you just talk about it so casually?!

Why are you grabbing his hand, Haruhi. What do you want to-

Hell, no.

Cue Keiichi fight as much as possible to get his hand back before Haruhi places it there. TOUCH HIM YOURSELF, DAMNIT!!]

This isn't part of the deal!

[He's not shrieking. He's yelling in a deep man's voice. Really. GIVE HIM BACK HIS HAND!!!]

[...okay no that wasn't part of the deal Haruhi. For now he agrees with Keiichi. He intercepts Keiichi's hand somewhere in the middle and interlocks fingers so Haruhi won't be able to continue trying to molest them.] No, it's not. And it's his choice Haruhi.

...Fine!

[JEEZ. LOSERS.

She retracts her hand with a little yell and then pouts. S-sob]

[HIS HAND IS HIS AGAIN! Unless Minato's still keeping it. Keiichi just sighs and relaxes now though. Kiss, what kiss, it has gone from his mind.]

Uh, what is my choice again?

[Derp.]

[he's not keeping it but he's still watching Keiichi intently. Now you're just being difficult.] Kissing.

What's the problem, anyway? It's not like you're some school boys and this is your first kiss or anything.

[Flatly.]

[Oh, right, Keiichi starts to go into panic mode again until Haruhi speaks... What the...]

What the... Don't tell me that it's normal in your time to be this age and having had your first kiss already!

[......Keiichi are you really...

Well at least his freaking out isn't just from not liking the idea.]

Yes?

I had mine when I was twelve, I think. Maybe eleven?

Edited 2011-02-20 21:29 (UTC)

What the... Eleven?! Isn't that too young??

[Looking at Minato, don't tell him you too had your first kiss so soon.]

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